Home Sweet Home

What a year!  There has been much going on and many relocations.  Ten in eighteen months to be precise, which in and of itself takes its toll, on both body and spirit.  I have been transient for too long now.  Whilst it has been an adventure, and I have been fortunate to spend time with some amazing people and meet some interesting characters, transience whilst liberating is also limiting.  It explains my absence from so many spheres of my life, including this one, thank you for your patience.

So where to now?  Well, just over a week ago I moved into my own place, my first solo dwelling.  

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Life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.

When you make a conscious decision to live, life starts to take you in some strange directions that you would not have otherwise chosen.  The past 6 months have been enlightening to say the least.   I have been so fortunate, to discover new friends and reignite old friendships that continue to surprise.  I have found happiness and love in unexpected places.  I have experienced sadness and tears and although I struggled to understand the whys and wherefores (understanding things has always been important to me), I have had to learn to accept it.  

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By Blood and by Design…

Sometimes, people look at me with perplexed faces.  People that have known me my whole life, whom I haven’t seen in years.  Their eyes search mine piercingly, often for what seems like interminably long moments, and they are confounded.  They all reach the same conclusion, their faces are filled with amazement as they say, almost dumbfounded “But, you haven’t changed at all.”  I assure them I have, I am taller, and older, and greyer, I am more more achey, and slightly larger, and I hope, a lot wiser.  my standard response is that I have indeed changed,  and it’s just hair dye.  They are always dismissive and tell me I’m wrong.

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Come what may...

The tears started and I tried to hold them back, as I had so many times before, but I couldn’t any more, and despite my fears of being judged, of alienating her, of being seen as weak, she understood. There were no useless platitudes, no judgement, just a sharing of a pain and a sadness that shouldn’t be borne alone. 

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Let’s Talk

If we are lucky, I mean really lucky, there is an intimacy that you get to share with another person unlike your other relationships.  Not in a sexual sense, I mean a closeness that can be physical (what can I say? I’ve Italian blood, we talk with our hands and I am, after all, a hugger) but an intimacy that comes from a deep understanding of the other.

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A deliberate life

So, it’s been a while…  Like you there has been much happening in my life.  We are all so very busy, meeting deadlines, meeting expectations, or doing the do.  When I talk to friends and family and ask whats been happening, the usual response is not much, just work, or just life.  But are we really living?  We are to busy meeting the needs of our jobs or our commitments that we don’t have time to actually meet the people that matter, to meet our own expectations for ourselves or to do what we truly want  to do.

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It was violent and it was beautiful

Road tripping this weekend with Deanna to Wilsons Prom despite the weekend weather coming straight from the middle of winter instead of autumn was still a good idea.  We were planning to see the Big Drift but the rain and the cold had other ideas.  Much driving, much walking, many kangaroos and the most beautiful bays and headlands I have seen in a good long while.

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The passing of time

Have you ever sat and watched time pass?  Not worrying about going somewhere or doing something, not conscious of any clock?  Have you ever sat and watched the landscape change as the light builds and then fades?  The sun sweeping overhead the only record of the hours slipping by?  It is a luxury we can rarely afford these days, and one I rarely get to indulge in, but to do so in the beauty of Pyrenees mountains at the Chateau du Gudanes was truly a gift.

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Stage 2 SIN to AMS

Don’t get me wrong, I know I have it easy - flat beds on the plane, great food - comfortable lounges to relax in where you don’t have to stand over your carry on like a guard dog and food and beverages are provided.  It all helps immensely, but travelling long distances can make even the most comfortable of waits, long drawn out affairs that leave you well - a bit loopy.

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Bon Voyage

This morning I set off on my voyage to the Chateau de Gudanes.  Very little sleep (read 2 hours) following debates and discussions with Deanna and John into the wee hours, couldn’t get to sleep after that on account of my brain being so wired so I read for an hour and a half.  I’ll sleep on the plane right?  Never have slept well on planes in the past but why shouldn’t this be the start of something different right?  Wrong.  I digress…

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RIP testing in pubs

Since I was a little girl, reporters have been putting the news to “the pub test”.  The idea being that “the pub test” guages public opinion and provides an “every man” view.  But after years of watching people sitting in pubs telling us what they think, I have to ask - Is it just me or is it time to lay “the pub test” to rest?

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